Monday, December 31, 2012

Oh, The Places We'll Go

Well, here is it...New Years Eve.

2013. Remember as a kid the year 2013 felt like forever away, and surely there would be flying cars, and robot servants (followed by a robot uprising), and all sorts of other bizarre futuristic things? Of course, those things do exist, just not how you thought they would. Give it a few more years. Shit just keeps getting stranger.

 Time for reflection, or something, right? Fun.

 This year has taken us so many places...and nowhere at all.

 Living in England for several months. (glorious)
A road trip around North-Eastern United States with James (and meeting a whole bunch of people from Twitter!).
Two offers down on houses, both lost. (one pretty much stolen from us).
A seasonal job, our first job in the United States since 2004, since we last lived here. (the last day was December 24th)
Personal growth? Probably not. It's been a struggle of a year, mentally and physically (can't win them all...)

 Here we are, still living in The Mother's basement (one of those things we didn't win); we expected to be not by now.

 James got a job though, he should start promptly in the New Year (as soon as they get his urine test back). Good pay, with a good company. So that's awesome.

 We (James, and us) have been seriously considering moving out of the city we currently reside in, to a town 40 miles away. It's small, with a population of less than 1000. The housing, both prices and taxes, are more affordable; the market where we are currently living being a seller's one. The idea of being so far removed from what we all consider civilization, is making us nervous. The cities nearby being what they are anyway (not very populated, and simply full of "box stores"), and not at all like the ones near the property we looked at this past summer, several hours away. It's making everyone involved nervous. It equals a long drive to work everyday, in the winter it can be dangerous. It equals a lack of culture, amenities, convinces; however, it also equals silence, few distractions, plenty of time for us to paint, to garden, to develop more recipes for a cookbook, and work on other writing. And generally get all the alone time we're likely to need, for a bit.

 The primary residence of interest is a large white two-story, 3 bedroom turn-of-the-century house on a giant lot, with the potential to buy an empty lot next to it. The price is unbeatable, despite it needing massive amounts of work. It hasn't had a thing changed, interior wise, since at least the late 50's (some of us are excited about the interior design work that needs to be done). It also needs a new roof, and the siding could use a fresh coat of paint...at least. Probably the electrical needs to be updated. And it only has baseboard heating from what we can tell. It's marginally better than the previous house we put an offer on, and far better than our beloved Weeping Willow property (except for the lack of the 40 acres)

 Probably the biggest thing? The day after Christmas we applied to go back to University, to finish a bachelors degree. The job market is limited with simply our culinary arts degree, and with the kind of physical problems we have; so after months of looking for work here at a wage we find fair, and coming up empty, we decided perhaps it'll be better to finish our degree. We have to do something, after all.

 So, we're going to be a University student again...(if they re-admit us). There are a wise range of feelings about this.

 It's part of a long-term goal anyway. Long-term, ha! Those never work out...but they are sometimes fun to make, as long as you don't get too "married" to them and can be flexible when things get uprooted.

 So, this year has been one long "adventure", punctuated by sitting around, with promises of more to come in the New Year. Oh, the places we'll go (just a little homage to the late great Dr. Seuss).

 In the meantime, why don't you sit around a little...and read some of our archives (or don't, what the fuck difference does it make).

 While we've written loads over the last couple of years, the entries below are representative of some of the "better" (coherent, topical, apropos, etc.) things we've written, ranging from topics such as sex, life, mental illness/health, relationships, current events, art, philosophy, food, and more.

(Also: The Stories of Us - A grouping of all the entries we've written about our past. Contains some material not suitable for sensitive people and those under the age of 18.)

May you go many places, do many a thing,
meet all kinds of people; or sit, doing nothing.
At least be inspired by life as it goes,
and add to things your brain already knows.
(by Just Call Me Frank, as inspired by Dr. Suess)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
The Mental Health Entries:
- Mostly Dissociative Identity Disorder/Multiple Personality Disorder Related
2012
2011
The Other Girl - Stuff She Wrote:
General Health:
2012
2011
Family:
2012
2011
Relationships:
General
2012 
2011
"Standby"
2011
"Fuck Face"
2011
James/The Boyfriend:
2012


2011
Friendships:
2012
2011
Work:
2011
Life:
2012
2011
Travel:
2012
2011
Food & Cooking
2012
2011
Opinion/Philosophy/Current Events:
2012
2011
Art/Poetry:
2012
2011
Humor/Fun/Sex/Random:
2012
2011
Social Media: (Social Media is ever evolving, older information may not be up-to-date.)
2012
2011
Guest Bloggers:Our Guest Blogger, Kerry Stott (@kerrystott), Writes About...
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Thursday, December 27, 2012

Crossing Over...

We've made an "extended-family safe" Facebook account.
It's full of people who, if they knew this blog, if they knew...well...anything about us, really...

We'd never agree to see them again.

Dad, Mom, and both brothers (and their wives), know their way here. For over a year now, they've been able to find it all. It's been confronted face-to-face.

But extended family? No. Some of them know. One, that we know of. Dad told one of his brothers...about our..."condition".

There has now become a grey area...between us...and..."me". There is no me. There hasn't been...forever. Just the façade of one. We got of "her"...but now. Now, she'd come in handy (as much as we hated her).

It was easy to avoid when we lived in other countries, in other states, too far to travel from for family gatherings.

It's all changed now. Now we're back "home". It's harder to avoid.

Their Christian principles, their overall NRA-backing principles...anti-abortion, anti...most things we stand for, and everything those things entail...if they crossed paths with our uncensored honestly...with us. This blog. Our Twitter(s). What we maintain as our real Facebook account.

Well. We can't even imagine.

Now we balance two Facebook accounts. It's like a split, within several others.

This should be...fun.

A project in being...normal. Probably.

The day we accidentally cross the two accounts should, at least, make a good story...
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Wednesday, December 26, 2012

So Different

It's getting close to the end...of 2012.

We don't have regrets; but personal choices over the years...we don't forget. We've learned. Of course. Some people have regrets forever, other's learn, and move on.

Sometimes we miss people from our past, even two years ago.
Two years ago, 2010...we had a beautiful New Year's dinner at a fancy restaurant with the woman who is now our ex-bestfriend. She didn't deserve, probably, how our friendship abruptly ended.
Her, and her boyfriend...and a man who was in all likeliness was in love with us (Standby).
Weeks later it all changed. But. It was the last time we probably felt normal.
Silently miserable; but somehow...well, we can't put it into words. Which is odd.

Now. Now, it's all different. So different. It's going to be so much more different. It makes us...nervous? Scared? Sad?

We just might be mourning it all, our past...a little.

Which is also fucking strange, and new.

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Monday, December 24, 2012

Something

Backache that is making our eyes burn, cold and hollow in their sockets.

It started Saturday night as body pain, it hurt to have our skin even lightly touched, and we could feel our bones. This morning we went to work and it grew worse, now it's everything that hurts.

Since getting home from work we've spent every minute with a hot water bottle and a glorious fleece blanket, on the sofa.

Now we've poured a Gin, in hopes the pain subsidies and it makes us sleepy enough to pass out at a reasonable hour and sleep through the night, after tossing and turning last night until 4:30 am from the discomfort and pain.

Today was our apparent last day of work though, with suggestions that they may call us in for a couple more days the end of the week, or at least before New Years Day. We'll see. Of course we'll do it; we could use the extra income.

It's Christmas Eve. We're not really into Christmas (most of us anyway...Gifts make many of us uncomfortable. They make me uncomfortable, anyway), but Merry Christmas/Happy Holiday anyway.

Apologies for the very lame entry. Or something.

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Friday, December 21, 2012

Testing...Testing...One...Two...

James got a job today.
A pretty good paying one too.

Meaning if we can't find a house to buy within a month, we'll still be moving out of here (The Mothers house)...only into an apartment instead, for a bit.

Our last day of work is Monday. It was temporary, so expected. That's okay.

We wrote this tonight...because we want to see if it will stick (granted it's a done deal...he only needs pass a drug test...and he doesn't do drugs).
But.
Seems like everything good and promising we've written about here this year has turned to shit.

Testing...testing...one...two...
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