Wednesday, September 7, 2011

There's More Than One Way To Skin A Troll

What started out as an enjoyable evening on Twitter, and an innocent exchange, because we were drinking, spiraled into a trollish attack when our Sucide Prevention Month post, written by our guest blogger and friend @KerryStott, hit the "Twitter waves" (Timeline).

As per Twitter, read from the bottom up on the following screen shots...which are completely fragmented...ironically.

You'll have to skip to the bottom of this lower image to start
where the other left off, a la Twitter Style.

A fairly new male follower decided he didn't like the post, (or rather the post that Kerry primarily wrote) saying it "glamorized" suicide. We (last night, Catherine) asked him to explain why he thought this (don't think that screen shot of her request made it into the bunch)...he did not...instead he started attacking us about our age, and it spiraled. I'll admit, some of our younger alters are not equipped to handle attacks on Twitter, whereas Frank would have given the bastard a verbal beating, (and did, eventually) and others would have handled it much differently.

One of those screen shot is how Sam dealt with it. He's our protector of the younger. He's only 16, but he's an angry angry boy.

Then Frankie stepped in. It was really a bad night, not helped at all by the drinking that had gone on while we were on Twitter. (the only way we can sleep through the night, and not wake up every hour, is by drinking these days)

It really spiraled from there, and then Frankie maintained control and the incident was mostly put out of our mind; until morning, when a fellow friend, fellow DID "sufferer" sent us an @ saying he had just performed his very first block. Our response to this was poorly constructed and the "troll" got angry, because he picked up on it.

In the end we chose to ignore him after the following messages:

You know what, some of us just don't have the capacity to give a fuck, yet others are sensitive (they are younger).

We understand some people might view us as "bat shit crazy"...we also understand, and KNOW, that some people think us more sane than the half of society that judges people based on things like their levels of mental health.

This troll, who hadn't bothered to read our blog, not even the top banner that says who we are, just for a little understanding, felt confident enough to say the things he did to us (all the while admitting he had only skimmed it before "attacking" us about it), and then eventually told us we were "self-important" (because of his misunderstanding as to why we use "we" and "us" in our Tweets), as well as calling us a cunt, and a fat ass (which, by the way, we are not...a fat ass, that is. We're a size 8/10, with a proportionate ass.)
One of our followers, who he had addressed separately, who came to our defense. We thank you.
This stuck with us, him calling us "self important". All day as we went about some of our work tasks, pipping butter rosettes...and, well, we had some switching today and the only thing I can remember is us being very angry and shoving a lot of stuff, and scowling a lot...and me...thinking thoughts about our sous chef that would get us in trouble with the boyfriend. (Sorry, honey...I'm "lonely"...)

We'll get back to more about the "self important" stuff, meanwhile...trolls are all over the internet, and in social media they reign. Here is a little screen shot of an article we read tonight, which we thought applicable....
Screenshot of a NYTimes article, if you click it then it will take you to the article in it's entirety.
Having read that, some of our trolls do not seem so bad in comparison...though it depends which of us they are dealing with; we did have a mean one a few months back whose comment on a painting we wrote completely threw some of us into a tailspin (read: sobbing and calling Fabulous was a very bad time of year for us). It currently lives in the comments section of this post

In our time on Twitter, for US it's been about 9 months, us being us, obviously we have encountered many people who some might consider Trolls, for a variety of reasons (and actually, the guy who we talked about at the beginning of this post, we didn't even consider him a troll until one of our followers told us to stop paying attention to that "troll")...we usually have been able to talk to them rationally, and then they become devout followers...and friends.

Not this time.

Bottom line, if you are on the internet and blogging about, or have a social media account that you also use to deal with something you are passionate about, you will incite the evil trolls...(we try to remind some of US of that all the time).

The thing is, there are so many wonderful people who aren't trolls, but all it takes is one nasty fucker to spoil a night, or a day at work.

How to deal with a Troll
Not feeding the troll is a problem for some of us, because we've had positive results...that's one of our optimistic dears at work for you...but ultimately, what we tell the rest of us, and you...don't respond. We stopped responding today when the comments elevated to become extremely rude and harassing...and he went away...hopefully for good.

Kill them with Kindness -
We'll admit, this is one (as well as the next two) of the tips we found online...there are only tips given to businesses...people seeimlingly forget that every day people/writers/those in the public eye, can be subject to this bullying. (A troll is a bully)

We're guessing being kind to a troll is akin to waving and smiling to that guy who just gave you the finger on the interstate.

Reach out for support -
We do this by RTing, sometimes. If one of us feels they can't handle the situation they RT the harassment in hopes someone comes to the rescue, but other times it's to show what a complete cunt the person is. And if it happens in the blog, we blog about it, it's therapeutic...more people read our blog than most would guess, but sadly never enough for our advocacy goal.

We've had people who know us from real life turn into trolls, and have support from followers on Twitter, and friends on Facebook, and blog readers, who have been inspired through our blog come to our defense. Reach out, to wherever you have to when you need help with a troll.

Listen -
Yeah,we got this tip from business related troll literature...listen but also take with a grain of salt...this is how we listened...

He said we are "Self important".
No, but we are not self important.

We're important.
Conceited to say? No.
All we have to know about us, to know that overall we are important, is the countless DM messages sent to us...
[paraphrased, but accurate]
"Thank you. My mom suffers from DID and you've given me understanding on what she goes through"
"Thank you, your suicide blog entry was just what I needed. My family member is in the hospital right now because of suicide"
"You help me pull through my day"
"You have inspired me to write"
...and the list goes on.

Last weekend we were up till well into 2am DMing (Direct Messaging) with a couple of people, one who had placed themselves on self-suicide watch, asking us questions about mental illness (we directed them to see a professional, but we're willing to listen), and a young woman who we scrolled across in the Timeline who clearly needed someone to listen to her. We (the one we were that night, honestly, I never would have done it) extended a hand to them, offering our e-mail address if they ever needed to talk.

Self important. No. But guess what. People who read our blog, our FRIENDS and followers, and people on Twitter who know about us, and feel safe to contact us, because they know we won't judge when it comes to the deep issues (even though are tweets, sometimes, can be a bit cunty bitchy). And though sometimes we struggle with own survival...knowing that we can help someone for a day, an hour, any amount of time, makes us feel like we are others. But never to ourselves.
At the end of the day, when faced with a troll, look at the people who matter,the people who you influence and touch with what you say or do, not the troll and his worshipers, for they are a sad bunch who are angry, and disappointed, by something in thier life, and it's not you.

This post was written for our wonderful followers, and some of us...some of us who have not had a lot of experience first hand with people like those we have experienced since writing and putting our life in the "public eye". Those of us who are older have been trying to guide them, the younger ones, but as anyone knows...guiding the young, trying to teach them how to act and feel...will get you nowhere, and they have to find out for themseleves.
*Notes to trolls, specifically our recent one...if you're gonna be a douche, you might not want to a) have the location of your Tweets publicity known OR b) provide Twitpics of your face.

As our troll was trolling last night, our protective boyfriend, who could see the distress in Catherine's face, was locating said troll a mere hour and a half away from his own location in the UK.

Meanwhile, on Twitter, you never know who you are dealing with. We are comfortable in the fact that any one of our followers could actually be a murderer, a psychopath, completely fucking insane...There are reasons that people are pushed to that edge.

Be a social media troll, we dare you.

P.S. We WE'RE gonna hide our "special friends" identity,,,but I decided...fuck it, it's too much work.
~Emmie (see, I can write about more than just sex)

No comments:

Post a Comment