This was post number 2 from James, he's writing more than us these days...we must kick his ass for making some of us look bad to the others...of course he's not battling a vicious Twitter addiction like some of us...so there's that.
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Today was a good day
subtitle: Not to say there haven't been others...
I am aware that most of the posts are talking about bad days; days where there has been stress and hurt and anger. It isn't always like this, it really is mostly great being here with them.
Yesterday (August 10th, 2011) was a good day. OK, right here is where I have a dilemma. Whilst I am free to talk about individual alters, for the sake of general posts I think I should probably avoid doing so. If for example (and I use this one only because it's already been mentioned) I talk about how great yesterday was and I mention Emmie specifically (though it wasn't just Emmie) then how does that reflect on the other alters? Not just on those that were also around that day but on all of them regardless. The best option I can think of is to simply say "they" and "we". However, a thought to myself is a question of "is this the best thing for this blog bearing in mind it's primary objective? I don't know. I'll come back to that one.
So back to yesterday...
We had a great day. We went out to run some errands, we met up with Fuck Face and annoyingly I couldn't stab him with the bottle. On the way to the meeting I was told that if I could slip in a few cunts at him I could tie them (Frank et al) up and do anything I wanted to them!!! I spent the entire walk going through various mock "conversations" with him that would give me an excuse to smack him one. We were late for example and I had this whole situation planned: We arrive, he comments about us being late and I could get straight in there with a "Yeah and you're one more smart arse response away from me jamming the first object to hand into your fucking face, now sit the fuck down". Annoyingly he was walking towards us having got tired of waiting so when we got to him they made the apologies and introduced us. Now I'm a complete cunt when I want to be but to launch into an unprovoked attack is still beyond what little morals I have.
We head back to the bar and we all sit down and have a pleasant conversation. He's being nice and it's annoying the shit out of me. I ask for a bottle of beer purely as I wanted a bottle in my hand ready for him to slip up. I spend most of the time "fingering" the bottle, itching for an excuse to smash it around his head. But he's nice.
Later they tell me that's the "problem" with him. It's difficult to actually hate him. Don't get me wrong, I still want him dead. I still want to see his eyes close and feel that last breath as I tighten my hands around his neck. But I just can't do so without a provocation. And as much as I wanted to, I couldn't do or say anything just for the "reward". That would be wrong too. And not forgetting that even with permission, he is still a friend (sorry, they believe he is a friend) to at least one of them.
However, I did tell them that I WILL call him a cunt before I leave. Even if I have to just resort to the age old macho testosterone fuelled "I'll be back and if I hear that you've.... blah blah I'll fucking slit your throat you cunt". But I'd rather he gave me reason. I do have a conscience believe it or not.
After that we bought some alcohol and headed home. The walk home is interrupted several times for erm... gratuitous kissing and groping which culminates in sex in the apartment elevator; we nearly get caught save for a 4 second warning hearing the person leave their apartment which has us both exiting the life as soon as the person opens the doors still trying to push dresses down, panties and shorts up, laughing hysterically.
Today isn't great just because of the sex (I just like to boast). It was great because simply we enjoyed each others company, we talked lots, we spent a lot of time together, actually together rather than just sat across from each other in silence, twittering.
As a bit of a side note, I was talking to them about how I am starting to get a good sense of who is "here" and spotting switches. The more I get to recognise this and the more I'm aware of who I am with the more natural it would be to use names. Frank is the only one that gets called by name but that's mostly due to the fact that that is the accepted name to refer to the "collective". Now I know I can't use names - it's been discussed many times and I have done it once - but when I know who it is I'm talking to and they are their own unique person it's getting harder to resist the urge... no, it's more than an urge, it just seems right, to (not) say their name. When I'm standing in front of them, talking to them, looking at them it just seems so normal to call them by name. Of course, if I did and I was wrong the shit would hit the fan!!!
I will try and write more good day posts. Of course many of them will probably be shorter and consist of "we had a great day, we talked, we laughed, we went out, we ate, it was lovely..." kind of thing but it's important to know that these times greatly out weigh the bad.
The bad days are bad "days" either. They are moments of a day. Sometimes it effects more of the day's moods than others but as a whole it is just a fraction of that day.
Bethany, Cassandra, Catherine, Emmie, Frank, Ivy, Melody, Sam and "Brooke"... Just wanted to say their names....
[copied from the original location http://frank-from-the-outside.blogspot.com/]
Other posts James has written about us...
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