Thursday, April 21, 2011

Short Entries 5: Unleashing Anger

WARNING: This post is explicit and contains content of violent and sexual nature. There is also some fucking bad language in it.

Could be a running log of anger...or not...

9:32 am
Today can just fuck off and die...and so can he - and by he we mean FNA.
Frank said we were not going to write about him anymore - but guess what. Frank's not here bitch.

This is the kind of stuff I like to write to him because he is a selfish fucker who mistreated us because, well, he's a selfish fucker. There are those of Us that don't like when I write mean things to him, but they can just suck a big one today. Just try and stop me.
"You can fuck off and die today. Hope you have a fabulous fucking three day sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo deserve it. In case you're curious, that's sarcasm you stupid prick."
Fully updated and having discussed last weekends meeting with the We; last weekend being the final fucking drink/kiss off session at a shitty restaurant he kept insisting we go back to.

Frank asked him (FNA) why he let their affair go on, he having sent us a message in response to several others the night before our final meeting: "I asked you on a couple of occasions if that was going to be a problem and you said "no". Meaning he asked if we were going to have problems not bringing emotion into it. He wrote that to The Other Girl within the first three weeks of the affair though, and she was in love with Standby, not him. That poor girl had her mind set on forever with Standby; of course she wasn't interested in having emotional ties with FNA. He was not her type for a relationship.

He never again asked us if it was a problem. Not once for the months we sent him letters telling him how much we adored him, how much we loved spending time with him; writing about how we fantasized about things we wanted to do with him of a non-sexual nature; like travel and just be in the same room while he did the things he liked to do, and we painted; because we both tend to be loners we thought this fantasy perfection...and Frank and some of the others felt the need to share those things with him. All the while he kept fucking us behind his wifes back, knowing we were in love with him.

We've shared enough with him and he abused our honesty, ate it up with a spoon because when it comes down to it he knows we are the kind of hot girl he always fantasized about while playing video games in his parents basement, being unpopular as a kid - then he got us, and we made him feel better about himself, we made him feel desirable - and being desired by a "hot chick" must feel great; being desired by a "hot man" would feel great to us, no doubt - so why would that be different for him. 

We know all that pretension that he flings about is just a cover for his insecurity. Humans are not that hard to figure out. 

Frank confronted him at the restaurant last weekend, she told him that carrying on with us, well after knowing we were in love with him, and knowing so much about us to begin with (he used to read this blog), was selfish and rude. He agreed. Not only that, Frank got the impression that he somehow meant to blame US for things happening how they had up to this point, like he had no hand in getting us to fall in love with us, by being charming and spending actual quality time with us. He should have just fucked us and left each time, instead of engaging us in hours of conversation and non-sexual activity.

The most galling thing? Frank got the impression that their meeting only lasted as long as it had because he was waiting for us to drink just enough so he could get a last invite up to our apartment, less than 2 buildings away from the restaurant.

Use us one last time, just like when he woke us up the previous Saturday when returning our apartment key, after we had ended the relationship, and in our sleepy insobriety somehow talked us into a last fuck. Which, you know, was great because he was finally getting better at it, and that was the best he'd been so far. Yeah. He wasn't that great in the sack at the start, it was a work-in-progress situation - we love(d) him for him, not for great sex - though his creativity and willingness to try just about anything made him a great lover; but we love(d) the whole package.

If we loved someone simply for great sex we would have stuck with Standby - HE was great sex...and hung like nobodies business.

The audacity of that selfish prick.

I'll just sign off on this entry as "Stabby" because so far my name is a blurry spot in our mind. Maybe that's why I'm so pissed too...for the life of me I can't remember my fucking name.

10:11 AM
That fucking fucker in the hall shuffling his god damn feet should try to pick them up. That scratch-scratch-shuffle-shuffle sound is grating the inside of the head.
10:27 AM
Did you know I fucking hate Twitter? Yep. Hate it. Though hanging on Favstar is where I like to be, RTing other people's funny shit. My kind of anger makes us look bad - like last week when I was obsessed with dancing in blood and going on "slay rides". It's nice that Frank has created all sorts of outlets for us to play on, and can laugh at the disturbing shit we post. Good thing we don't scare her. Okay, we scare her, but not as much as you'd think.

Wish she'd fucking come back already, I hate to be out here when we're at work - I think I may destroy her job.
11:08 AM
It's a good fucking thing I hate it here so much, if I didn't I might try to take over Frank; but without the help of everyone else I could never do it. They are beyond scared of me, because they know if I took over they would all be fucking gone, and then there would be damage to anyone who remained. I have my favourites. 

They'll never help me destroy her like we all helped Frank destroy that piece of shit, The Other Girl. In case you were confused earlier when I called her a "poor girl", that was fucking sarcasm.

Man, it was fun destroying her.
11:22 AM
Things we sent him:
"Right now I'd just love to fight with you, shove each other around, slam each other against walls and angrily fuck the life out of you. Hope it's just as satisfying to think/read about it, as it would be to do it. 
It's probably not though; and we lied, we hope it's miserable for you to know you're not going to touch us again - you fuck face."
This is why I scare the other ones - and why we no doubt scare him; because in the end he's a scared little man.
My anger makes me horny - but strangly only for him. You can see how that would be frustrating.
We're more likely to unleash our aggression this way, then ever hurt anyone. 
We are all rational here.
12:27 PM
Even I can't roll around in the anger (which I love to fucking do) when we find out we aren't going to be an aunt anymore. We were kinda looking forward to having a kid to spoil, even though most of us are not fond of them.

Frank's not going to be happy. This is only going to make her sad, it's making us all sad.

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