A Dating Update - Stuck On Recycle

Seriously, this year has started set on recycle somehow.

Thinking that I had “rid” myself of The Plumber, The Icelandic and TDF (Third Date Flunkie) in December -  I prepared to set out the new year with just my “standby” (have never talked about him – likely will not) and Fantastic Special Edition ... oooo, he earned a name for himself. Too bad I'll never discuss him again.

Anyway, thinking I was going to start off the year new, with little complication, call me surprised when all three of them began contacting me again at the same time. Day 7 of the New Year and I'm back at square one.

Granted The Icelandic never went to far, at the end of December he went MIA for awhile, only to re-appear and then freak right out. I “broke” up with him in the sense that I explained to him I did not foresee the possibility of a relationship for us, however I enjoy his company, his friends, and would still like to see him on occasion. He confessed that he thought I was ”to good for [him] anyway”.

In what context he meant it I don't know. (i.e. I was too good of an influence [yes, strange to imagine, but a possibility with this one *ting of my halo*], or generally just too good. I choose to think it's a combination of the two. He agreed that staying friends would be nice, as he also enjoys my company, citing me as an interesting person.

The Plumber sent me a message, wishing me a happy new year and telling me he misses me. Want to take me call him tomorrow because he wants to take me out tomorrow night. Hmmm. Really? Pretty sure I'm always rude to him...

So I told him “maybe”. Hey, I could use an adventure.

TDF started FB chatting with me, and texting me, every day. His request is that I allow him to take me out again, I asked him what the purpose of that would be, he said “to catch up”. I flat out told him that he only wants to take me out because I bruised his ego. No response. I told him I'd have time for him in February, maybe.

So, while I am still planning on sticking with my dating hiatus for January, I might decide that a little recycling is okay. A girls gotta have fun;)

Meanwhile, while I try to get myself ahead of this dating curve (this is all new territory for me), I'm working on some music posts and some other stuff. I hope I'm back, stick around!

Halloween - Surprisingly Uneventful

Well, I have to say I have mixed feelings about how last night went.

My gal pal, Crazy J, picked me up last night to hang at Ninja Princess' place for pre-party drinks and costume completion. Always fun with those two, ever since our trip to Vegas this past July we have become a tight little threesome; all being fantastic 30-somethings with a sense of adventure when we are together.

We talked Crazy J into ditching her plans for the evening to come out with us to a local rock bar for their Halloween bash. So, the three of us and Ninja Princess' boyfriend zipped around the city, making a stop at a local bar and restaurant to visit female friend who was working as a server. We managed to score free shooters "for dressing up" from the manager, who made sure to tell us if any of us needed a date "just give [him] a call".

After a shooter and a couple glasses of the white we headed to the bar, where it was far too early, there were far to few people (that changed later of course) and I was wearing far too little clothing.  If you read my recent blog about my Halloween costume you'll understand where that statement came from.

My mood had already been set on edge before I pranced into the bar, after an argument with Ninja Princess' boyfriend about why I was seeing "The Plumber" at all anymore.  And after a brief explanation he told me I'd proved whatever I was trying to prove and I should stop seeing him.  So, he kind of pissed me off, which isn't something you want to go into a bar being. I don't blame him for being pissed about it though, the week prior The Plumber had sent Ninja Princess, my best friend, some inappropriate text messages.  I straight up confronted him about it, he gave me his lies.  But like I've told you, my friends, and The Plumber: I have no interest in being his girlfriend.  Yes, he is a sleaze, but he is also a learning tool for me.  Or maybe he's just a tool. In any case I've been honest with him about having no intentions on being more.

Anyway.

It just felt like an awkward evening, and while I flirted it up with a couple of guys nothing came of it - strong eye contact, some smiles, but no approaches. On one occasion a guy, who was an acquaintance of Ninja Princess' boyfriend, seemed interested in who I was after I had poked him a few times with NP's plastic devil pitch fork, pointing at me and saying "what is your name?" while we were out on the patio enjoying the crisp air of fall. Never saw him again after that.  Though one of his friends later mentioned that he liked me, to which I exclaimed my disappointment in the fact that he hadn't really talked to me.

No matter how "happy" I felt with my liquid courage I was still feeling out of my comfort zone all wrapped up in much of nothing, with fish net thigh highs and garter, black angel wings and halo; at least I had the company of my good friends. It could have been the chilly breeze on my backside, or the fear of bending over to reveal more than anyone there had bargained for, that made me feel uncomfortable and possibly therefore unapproachable.

Or maybe I am just unapproachable to men; the only exception being "The Plumber" who met me for the first time when I had just gotten done with work, was completely a frumpy mess and was only there to show him what work needed to be done on my house. Otherwise nothing.

Why don't men approach attractive women unless they are stupid drunk and aiming way out of their league? I definitely had one of those, a clinger that followed me around in his Zach Galifianakis /The Hangover look-a-like costume, complete with "baby", which I kept spearing with my fork and Ninja Princess tried to rip the head off of.

So, sorry my friends, this entry is not as interesting as it could have been or as they have been.

Blame the men.

Laughing at insanity, but whose?

Sometimes men are just cracked in the head.  But so am I.


After a broken date last night, "The Plumber" started sending me texts late into the evening.  


How romantic is a marriage proposal via text?  Not at all.  Making me rolls my eyes, I responded by suggesting that he is insane, on drugs or drunk, or perhaps a combination of the three.  


Cut to me three hours later, me, blissfully asleep and being woken up by repeat phone calls (seemingly hanging up on someone immediately doesn't get the point across).  Apparently I had missed other texts in my sleep, him asking to pick me up and take me to his place.  Just had to see me I guess. I decided to give in.  I was already awake anyway, and once awake it's difficult for me to get back to sleep.


So there I was, 3am, throwing a change of clothes in my bag, laughing at my new found spontaneous streak this week and contemplating my own sanity.


What preceded was an unexpected evening of being told that he would "drink my bath water"; that he was so in love with me from the minute he laid eyes on me; that I am all he can think about; marriage proposals; expressions of love and an offer for me to move in with him.  Is that what happens when you ignore a man for two weeks?  What?


I had to explain that because I am not his girlfriend that none of that made any sense.  And I made sure to spell out that I have no interest in being his girlfriend. I just had to laugh at his outbursts of telling me the I was in love with him and he could tell by the way I look at him - clearly he can't read me well because the look I give him is that of constant amusement while my internal dialogue churns out thoughts of how dumb he really must be.


After trying to watch movies over his talking, and a brief sleeping interlude (and that's ALL there was...just so we are all on the same page here), he had to be up for work and being that he loves my company so, wanted me to go with him.  So while tooling around the city in his plumbing van this morning he asks:


"Why did we get back to here"


I looked around, fained confusion, grinned, said "we've never been here before" and took a sip of my coffee.


He picked up on the smart ass come back but really wanted an answer.  He says he figures that I must really like him.


I said: "You amuse me"


He didn't seemed thrilled that he was "entertainment" to me.  


The morning brought more talks of marriage - which, if you read my blog, is not a concept I am keen on these days (guess he wasn't drunk or on drugs last night...which means he is insane) - and telling me he wanted me to have his baby (also, not something on the plate). He can't understand why I don't want to marry him and so he shuttled me home so I can get on with my day, and now I sit writing this story, still laughing at the insanity; wondering if it is his insanity I am laughing at, or my own.

Newly single and attempting to get back at it...writing that is...or is it?

So, I took a hiatus from writing and have a desire (and much more time) to try to get back into it.  I haven't been keeping up with the news lately, finding other things to occupy my time as a newly single woman so the topics may shift to life as a single woman, which is really all about dating.


This should be exciting.


While we are on the topic of dating, I'd like to know in what parallel universe does a man think every woman over the age of 30 wants to hear how he is ready to settle down, get married and have kids? Do we (woman over 30) excrete some signal without our knowledge that makes men think this is what we want to hear, or are they conditioned to use those lines to attempt to peak our interest? Or are they turning into women?


As I am get older, I have decided to try to date men who generally wouldn't be my typical selection. Ultimately, characteristics for a man to hold any level of my interest should be: intellectually stimulating, outgoing and interesting with something to say who's not afraid to say it. They must have a wicked sense of humour. They must care about their appearance and hygiene (but not so much that it's an obsession). Did I mention they should at least own a book and have read it?  Is that to much to ask? Probably.


15 years of dating has of course led me to some interesting characters and prospects, but nothing I was willing to let stick.  Jury is still out on what the sticking factors are, but they have become more clearly defined lately after my first first experiment.


My most recent foray into dating involved time spent with a man who thus forward in life will simply be described as "The Plumber"...laugh all you want at the innuendo that could be gleaned from the title (I know my friends did), it was his actual job though. :)


Describing "The Plumber" came pretty easily after a week of getting to know him, needless to say he had none of the characteristics I look for.  My best ascertain of him can best be described as a "meat head Italian, with low level intellect who is suffering from a closet asshole complex".  Of course he didn't make that clear the first couple dates, seeming sensitive and caring, but it didn't take long to see the signs - and my boredom - and decided that was enough of THAT experiment. Of course he did have a benefit or two, but everything else outweighed the "perks"...I won't go into the perks, after all, my father reads my blog. :-O


So now I am ready for my next experiment.  Which is debuting tomorrow night at 8pm at a local cafe in my new neighborhood. A law student.  That has got to be more interesting.

My new writing space at my new apartment.